Mommy Confessional

Ever had one of those "I am the WORST mother in the world moments?" Well, I have.. This one tops the cake for me.

Saturday the girls had TBall practice. Usually I leave Gareth at home with Ryan for weekend practices, but with Ryan being really sick, I took Gareth with me. He was great during the entire 90 minute practice (how many 3 year olds do you know who can do that?). He ate snack, played with Gavin, snuggled, and ran around a bit.

Practice was over and we were heading to the car. We have to cross the school playground before we get to the parking lot and I told the kids they could slide two times then we had to go. The girls listened wonderfully (as usual) but Gareth just completely disobeyed. When he slid the second time I said "Ok, time to go" and started leaving. He ran back up the stairs and slid down again. Before I could catch him (while wearing a 20 pound 6-month old in a sling) he climbed the stairs again and hid on the playground. After 30 seconds I convinced him to come down. He was walking next to me, then ran back to the playground. This time I caught him by the waste and was half-carrying him across the playground. He wriggled out of my reach and back to the playground. All the other parents are making their way through the playground to the car, with little problem. I'm starting to get really frustrated with Gareth for not listening and also really embarrased. Yes, Hi, my name is Mary and I can't get my 3-year old to listen. How are you doing?

Long story short, two other moms helped me get him to the car. One helped me carry him to the parking lot when another mom ran up and said "You know what? I have my hands free, let me carry him for you." She did just that. She took him to the van, buckled him in and everything. Those moms are wonderful!! I kept thanking them for their help, but really saying thank you wasn't enough. There was no way I could pick him up while carrying Gavin (at least not safely) and I couldn't take Gavin and the girls to the car and come back and get him--it was too far.

We got in the car and I told Gareth he did NOT need to behave like that again and he would be disciplined when we got home. We got inside, I spanked him and put him in his room. I needed some time to cool off and so did he. I went into the other room and just cried. I felt so stupid and like a terrible mother.

Looking back I don't really know many moms who can "control" their 3-year olds, but at least they listen most of the time. The other moms told me he's really testing me, it's his age, it's because he's a boy, and my favorite "What? Like we haven't been there?" Those ladies are wonderful and I'm very thankful we're getting to know each other.

My mom told me something really helpful too. I was telling her how I just felt like the worst mom because I couldn't get him off the playground and how the other parents probably think I'm terrible. She just looked at me and said "You know what. They could have just stared at you with horrible looks on your face or ignored the situation completely. They've probably been exactly where you are and knew that you needed some help." I love my mom.

So tonight's the first game. We're all going, so at least I'll have help getting him to the car if he decides to disobey again. But it'll be interesting to see if he obeys or not tonight. He did a MUCH better job listening the rest of the weekend (of course his reward system with the Chuck E. Cheese incentive is helping a lot).